The Art Of Charm | High Performance Techniques| Cognitive Development | Relationship Advice | Mastery Of Human Dynamics

In today’s episode, we cover the value of sorrow and longing with Susan Cain. Susan is the author of the Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking, and her newest book Bittersweet: How Sorrow and Longing Make Us Whole is focused on sorrow and longing as inspiration to experience sublime emotions opposed to the constant positivity expected by society.  Modern society reinforces the idea that we should strive to be positive in everything we do, but is positivity always better for you, why do we then seek forms of entertainment that evoke feelings like sadness, and how should we treat these emotions that society tells us we need to dismiss or get over? What to Listen For Introduction – 0:00 Is there a link between creativity and melancholy? What is the difference between melancholy and depression and why does one support creativity while the other suppresses it? Why are we drawn to entertainment that evokes sadness – 15:21  What is it about sadness and beauty that we are drawn to? W

In today’s episode, we cover emotion efficacy with Dr. Aprilia West. Dr. West is a psychologist and executive and team leadership coach who works extensively with artists, creatives, and entertainment execs to increase their emotional intelligence, psychological flexibility, and resilience. Emotions influence our thoughts and actions everyday, so what can you do to understand them, understand where they come from, and understand how to manage them so they don’t lead you to make harmful decisions? What to Listen For Introduction – 0:00 What is emotion efficacy? What is the emotional default world and how does it shape your behavior? The importance of emotion efficacy – 13:33  What is the difference between feelings and emotions? The signs of low emotion efficacy – 27:00 How do you know if you have low emotion efficacy? What questions can you ask yourself to understand where you have room to grow emotionally? Five Steps to Increase Emotion Efficacy – 35:10 What can you do to increase your emotion effi

In today’s episode, we cover narcissism with Lily Walford. Lily is an international dating coach and the survivor of a toxic narcissistic relationship. Narcissists are all around us and can cause untold harm to our mental wellbeing, so what can you do to identify and disarm narcissists, how can you tell if you’re in a relationship with one, and what should you look for to avoid getting into a relationship with one? What to Listen For Introduction – 0:00 What does narcissism look like? How to identify narcissists – 15:30  What signs can you look for if you think you’re dating a narcissist? How do you know if someone is a narcissist? Self-care after a relationship with a narcissist – 24:05 What can you do to take care of yourself after a toxic relationship with a narcissist? Disarming Narcissists – 31:15 What can you to disarm a narcissist? How will a narcissist stop you from disarming him or her? Dating after a narcissist – 41:07 What 4 elements should you look for in a healthy relationship? What

In today’s episode, we cover the science of competition with Ashley Merryman. Ashley is the Non-Resident Senior Fellow for the Joint Special Operations University and author of Top Dog: The Science of Winning and Losing. Competition can be healthy and unhealthy, so how do you know the difference between healthy and unhealthy competition, what are the differences between how introverts and extroverts handle competition, and how does gender play a role in competition? What to Listen For Introduction – 0:00 What are the biggest myths surrounding competition and trying to be number one? What are the benefits of competition? Healthy vs Unhealthy Competition – 9:00  What is the difference between healthy competition and unhealthy competition? Where does the fear of failure come from? Overcome Fear of Failure – 15:30 What is the difference between a challenge and a threat and how can one lead you to failure while the other leads to success? What can you do to overcome the fear of failure when you know peopl

In today’s episode, we cover networking to survive the recession with AJ and Johnny.  People rely on those they trust in times of economic hardship, so what can you do to grow your network before the next economic downturn and what value can you offer to strengthen your existing network so you’re in a better position when the next recession hits? What to Listen For Introduction – 0:00 Why is networking so important when you’re starting in a new field or trying to move up in your current field? Why is a strong network important to have before a recession begins? What everyone gets wrong about networking – 13:03  How do you network effectively so you’re not shooting yourself in the foot at every networking event? What is social capital and why do you need to understand it to network effectively? What three ways can you provide value to anyone in your network? The 4 levels of support value you can offer to anyone – 23:20 What can you do to stand out from the crowd when congratulating or supporting someo

In today’s episode, we cover  with Angie Morgan. Angie is the co-author of Bet on You: How to Win with Risk, a book about discovering the formula for success and decision-making confidence to transform even the most risk-averse mindset. We have to take risks in order to become great at anything, but what do you do if that risk stops you dead in your tracks, who should you seek out for advice, and how can you manage risk so you can accomplish your dreams? What to Listen For Introduction – 0:00 How do you break something down that appears to be a large risk? Who are the three types of people you should look out for when getting advice on a big risk you want to take, and who should you avoid? How to Find High Value Communities – 13:05  Where can you go to find high value communities that will support you and help you on your journey to achieve your dreams? How to Grow Your Confidence – 20:20 What are the three components of confidence you need to focus on in order to become more confident? How to Mitigat

In today’s episode, we cover building high value relationships with AJ & Johnny.  Building high value relationships requires vulnerability, but what does it mean to be vulnerable, how do you know when to be vulnerable, and what are some simple strategies you can use to be more effective in relationship building? What to Listen For Introduction – 0:00 Why is it important to build high value relationships? How do you start making new friends? Turn Small Talk into Smart Talk – 12:00  Why is vulnerability important when building connections with people? How do you bring vulnerability into your social interactions? The Three Levels of Vulnerability – 17:00 What is the first level of vulnerability and how do you know when to use it? How do you know when to go to the deepest level of vulnerability? What red flags should you look for in the way people react to your vulnerability? The Cave Analogy of Vulnerability – 37:50 Why is it important to lead with vulnerability before expecting others to be vulnerab

In today’s episode, we cover social engineering with Christopher Hadnagy. Chris is an IT entrepreneur, IT security consultant, and the best-selling author of five books including his latest Human Hacking: Win Friends, Influence People, and Leave Them Better Off for Having Met You. Social engineering is an effective tool to get what you want, but what is social engineering, how can you use it to instantly build rapport with complete strangers, and what should you look for if you think someone is using it against you?  What to Listen For Introduction – 0:00 What is social engineering and how do people use it every day? How to Build Rapport  – 10:10  Why is it important to learn how to build rapport and how do you go about learning it? The Four Questions of Trustworthiness – 25:18 What are the four questions we ask ourselves to determine whether or not we can trust someone? How can you build rapport instantly with someone you’ve just met?  When is flattery NOT ok? – 41:30 When should you avoid complimen

In today’s episode, we cover contextual behaviorism with Dr. Emily Sandoz. Emily is a professor of social sciences in the psychology department at the University of Louisiana at Lafayette, the director of the Louisiana Contextual Science Research Group, as well as the Editor in Chief of the Journal of Contextual Behavioral Sciences, and has co-authored three books on acceptance and commitment therapy. Changing or eliminating problematic behavior is not as simple as flipping a switch, but what role does your environment play, how can you identify contextual problems in your daily life that are affecting your behavior, and what is the best way to learn new behaviors? What to Listen For Introduction – 0:00 What is contextual behaviorism and how does the environment influence your ability to change your behavior? Using  – 11:50  How can you use contextual behaviorism to change your problematic behavior? What does it mean to have access to certain behaviors and how do you what behaviors you do have access to?

In today’s episode, we cover high value behaviors with AJ and Johnny.  Being a high value person opens doors to opportunities you never thought possible, so what does it mean to be high value, what high value behaviors should you look for in yourself and others, and what simple steps can you take to filter high value people into your life? What to Listen For Introduction – 0:00 Why are high value behaviors important if you want to have a healthy social circle and fulfilling life? What does it mean to be high value – 16:10  What is the difference between high and low value behaviors and why should you avoid low value behaviors if you don’t want to be miserable? How do you deal with friends who want to hold you back when you’re trying to grow and be a better person? How to Build a High Value Social Circle – 28:00 What steps can you take to build and maintain a social circle of high value individuals who will support you and be there for you when you need them? Examples of High Value Behavior – 37:50 Ho

In today’s episode, we cover winning your breakup with Natasha Adamo. Natasha is a high-performance coach, relationship coach, speaker, blogger with over two and a half million readers, and the author of Win Your Breakup: How to Be The One That Got Away. Breakups can be painful and get drawn out, so what can you do win your breakup, what does it mean to win, and how can you avoid falling into another toxic relationship? What to Listen For Introduction – 0:00 What are the signs of toxic relationships? How do you win your breakup? Breaking the Toxic Relationship Cycle – 19:48  How do you break the cycle of jumping from one toxic relationship to another? What signs should you look for in a potential partner? Stay on your white horse after a breakup – 27:20 What steps should you take after a breakup to speed up the recovery process? What should you avoid doing after a breakup if you want to move on? Emotional Entrepreneurship – 45:36 What is an emotional entrepreneur and why are people drawn to emotion

In today’s episode, we cover mental health with Lori Gottlieb. Lori is a psychotherapist in Los Angeles, co-host of the podcast Dear Therapists, and the author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone. Mental health is a priority now more than ever, so what are the overlooked signs that someone is struggling with mental health, how do you know if you should talk to a professional, and why is boundary setting crucial to positive mental health? What to Listen For Introduction – 0:00 What are the overlooked signs that someone is struggling with mental health issues? What is the value in seeing a therapist versus talking to your friends and family about issues you’re experiencing in life? The self-sabotaging stories we tell ourselves – 11:12  Why do we tell ourselves stories about what happens to us and how do those stories have lasting negative impacts on us and the people around us? What impact do the people around us have on our mental health and what can you do if your friends aren’t healthy for you? Settin

In today’s episode, we cover influence with Zoe Chance. Zoe is a teacher, writer, researcher, climate philanthropist, earned her doctorate from Harvard, teaches Mastering Influence and Persuasion, the most popular class at the Yale School of Management, and is the author of Influence is Your Superpower: The Science of Winning Hearts, Sparking Change, and Making Good Things Happen. Influencing the people around you is a superpower, but how do you develop that ability through your charisma, what common mistakes are you making that kill your charisma, and what is the most important skill you need to influence people?   What to Listen For Introduction – 0:00 Why is your ability to influence others a superpower? What are the three paradoxes of charisma? Anti-charismatic statements – 15:15  What are diminishing statements, why do so many of us use them, and how do they kill your charisma? Charming vs Manipulating – 23:14  How can you tell the difference between people using strategies and tactics to build ge

In today’s episode, we cover metabolic health with Dr Philip Ovadia. Dr. Ovadia is a board certified Cardiac Surgeon, founder of Ovadia Heart Health, and the author of Stay Off My Operating Table: A Heart Surgeon’s Metabolic Health Guide to Lose Weight, Prevent Disease, and Feel Your Best Every Day.  What you put into your body has a direct impact on your metabolic health, but what is metabolic health, why is it important, and what can you do to support a strong metabolic health so you don’t end up on the operating table or in an early grave?  What to Listen For Introduction – 0:00 What is metabolic health and how does it impact the other areas of your life including mental health? The big medical myths – 13:17  What is the biggest medical myth that is making us more unhealthy every year? Should we be consuming supplements? How did unhealthy food become so normalized that we serve it in hospitals where we’re supposed to go to get better? The 5 metrics of Metabolic Health – 26:09  What metrics should y

In today’s episode, we cover trust and cooperation with Abbie Maroño. Abbie is the Director of Education at Social-Engineer, is a lecturer in Psychology, has a PhD in Behavior Analysis, was mentored by the body language expert Joe Navarro, and performs academic research specializing in nonverbal communication, trust, and cooperation. Trust is important because our survival depends on our ability to cooperate with the people around us, so why do we place a strong emphasis on competition, what signals should we look for to determine someone’s trustworthiness, and how do we build trust in the first place? What to Listen For Introduction – 0:00 What is the definition of trust according to modern science? How fast can trust be built and destroyed? The big myth about competition and survival of the fittest – 10:10  What do we get wrong about competition vs cooperation in modern society, and why does this misconception lead to unhappiness and discontent in the workplace? What nonverbal signals should you look

In today’s episode, we cover negotiation with Barry Nalebuff. Barry is a Professor at Yale where he has taught negotiation, innovation, strategy, and game theory for thirty years, and recently authored Split the Pie: A Radical New Way to Negotiate, which is based on his negotiation course. Negotiating can be intimidating if you don’t do it on a regular basis, so what simple tips can you remember to make your next negotiation a win, how do you negotiate with people who are clearly more experienced than you, and what is the best question to ask when negotiating your salary? What to Listen For Introduction – 0:00 What’s the difference between Split the Pie and Never Split the Difference? How to negotiate with unfair people – 10:55  What can you do to negotiate with people who don’t care about fairness? How can you “be ready to walk away” from a once-in-a-lifetime deal? Dealing with people who don’t see the win-win outcome – 21:10  How do we use empathy to get the other person’s perspective and come up wit

In today’s episode, we cover the brain with Lisa Barrett, PhD. Lisa is among the top one percent most cited scientists in the world for her revolutionary research in psychology and neuroscience, and is the author of the best-selling Seven and a Half Lessons About the Brain. As we learn more about the brain we realize how mistaken we once were, so what have we been getting wrong about the brain, what have we learned, and how can you use that information to eliminate the unhelpful patterns and bad habits holding you back from living a fulfilling life? What to Listen For Introduction – 0:00 Where did the myth about the lizard brain come from and why is it such a popular belief? Moving beyond the Lizard Brain – 10:47  What is the correct way to think about the conflict between rationality and what we mistakenly believe is the lizard brain so we can work toward becoming the people we want to be? How is our brain functionality connected to our metabolism and how can you use that information to increase your br

In today’s episode, we cover low value behavior with AJ and Johnny. We all exhibit low value behavior that can push people away from us, so what are low value behaviors, what makes us exhibit low value behavior, and what can you do to stop these low value behaviors from destroying friendships and relationships? What to Listen For Introduction – 0:00 What are low value behaviors, how do they push people away from us, and how can you notice them so you stop exhibiting them? Why do low value behaviors make it difficult to create lasting friendships and relationships? Why do we need attention, approval, and acceptance? – 14:20  What do we need from other humans to feel safe and why does every human need it? How does your childhood shape the way you seek out value in the world and what can you do if your childhood influenced you to exhibit a lot of low value behaviors? How to Identify Low Value Behaviors – 24:27  What is the difference between a high value person and a low value person? What is supplicati

In today’s episode, we cover passive communication with Dr Robert Glover. Robert is an internationally recognized authority on the Nice Guy Syndrome, has helped thousands of nice guys transform from being passive, resentful victims to empowered, integrated males, and is the author of No More Mr. Nice Guy: A Proven Plan For Getting What You Want in Love, Sex and Life. Trying to be the nice guy is a fatal step many men take to get what they want out of life, but what makes being a nice guy so bad, how can you identify your nice guy tendencies, and what can you do to get what you want without being a jerk? What to Listen For Introduction – 0:00 What is Nice Guy Syndrome and why is being a nice guy (or nice girl) counterproductive to getting what you want out of life? Does Nice Guy Syndrome also apply to women? Being a Nice Guy makes people like you less – 13:30  Why does being a nice guy lead people to trust you less and like you less, and what should you do instead? Why do Nice Guys seem inauthentic and u

In today’s episode, we cover the art of insubordination with Todd Kashdan. Todd is among the world’s top experts on the psychology of well-being, psychological strengths, mental agility, and social relationships.  Being a dissenter in today’s society is hard, but it is more important now than ever, so what can you do to raise questions about problems you see without being silenced, and how can you get your message across so people rally behind you instead of condemn you? What to Listen For Introduction – 0:00 What is the art of insubordination and why should you care? Why is it important to have a public square where people can meet and exchange ideas? The crucial importance of a clear consistent message – 12:07  If political polarization isn’t our biggest issue in society, what is and how do we overcome it? How does technology speed up how quickly we self-segregate and isolate ourselves from different ideas and why is this dangerous to society? Why does the use of labels get us into trouble and how do