Gut Punch News

You see it! In the corner of your eye, lives your shady, unhinged beliefs. You don’t know this phantom, but this shadow knows you.   

When you’re one step ahead of others, you’re considered a genius, but being two steps ahead makes you a lunatic.  

Life is like confetti. Little pieces of your life fall to the ground creating a big pile of trash that will be cleaned up by others.  

What happens when you do a news show after taking cough syrup? You get a little punchy.  

Somedays you want to scream. Others you want to vomit. Then there are those days you want to scromit.  

The who, what, where, why, and how JFK was killed.   

When you finally throw your social justice warrior boomerang, be sure it doesn’t return to quickly and smack you in the face.  

A final deep dive into the biggest story of 2017 - Hurricane Harvey aka the #metoo movement.  

When your devious plans fall through, don’t turn into an asshole because you’re likely to crap yourself.  

There’s a back story to every news event. Some are black and white, although you’d prefer them to be shades of gray.  

The news knows information can be used to control your knowledge base, thus making you their public puppet.  

Isn’t it peculiar when listening to the news, you only like those stories that reinforce your opinion.  

Luck is the residue of design.  

The new political climate is a scorched earth policy. Burn it all to the ground and start fresh.  

When people ask me what I do, I respond, “I buy microphones so I can yell at people on the internet and call them stupid!”  

As worldwide governments continue to be beastly towards its citizens, let’s control these untamed animals before it is too late.  

As the avalanche of social justice rushes down hill, there will be many casualties. Yet, over time, peace will return to the mountain.  

Here are a bunch of random topics which seem to be linked logically, but are not.  

As men fall from being accused of predatory behaviors, subjugating women, and covering their asses, will anyone land an uppercut to our President?  

The answer is obvious… Our world is a crazy, messed up place but luckily we only have so long to live in this hell.