Mom And Dad Are Fighting | Slate's Parenting Show

On this episode: Zak, Jamilah, and Elizabeth help a letter writer who is hurt by the cliquey moms in her parenting group. All the kids get along great. But the moms constantly make her feel like an outsider, despite her initiating conversation and planning hang outs. Zak, Jamilah, and Elizabeth share some tips for making friends with other parents, knowing your value, and ditching people who aren’t giving you the time of day.  Then on Slate Plus, they discuss Angela Garbes’ piece, The Morning Rush: Parenting at its Most Essential.  Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes.  Podcast produced by Kristie Taiwo-Makanjuola and Rosemary Belson. Slate Plus members get a bonus segment on MADAF each week, and no ads. Sign up now at slate.com/momanddadplus to listen and support our work. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this episode: Jamilah, Zak, and Elizabeth jump back into the potty-training trenches to help a parent who is at her wit’s end. Her kid is potty trained—or so she thought—but will not stop peeing in his pants before taking himself to the toilet. They share some tips for making the toilet actually appealing to her son.  They also respond to a listener who wrote in following the How to Address Death episode and check in about their plans for the fast-approaching (or already underway) school year.  Recommendations:  Zak recommends the show, A League of Their Own on Amazon Prime.  Elizabeth recommends the books Yo MIllard Fillmore! and Yo Sacramento! Jamiliah recommends Loot on Apple TV.  Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes.  Podcast produced by Kristie Taiwo-Makanjuola and Rosemary Belson. Slate Plus members get a bonus segment on MADAF each week, and no ad

On this episode: Jamilah, Zak, and Elizabeth dish about a baking disaster, being the non-fun mom while setting up camp, and why cool big kids make summer camp so magical. They then answer a question from an aunt who would love to be more of a presence in her nieces and nephews’ lives and support their kids at games and concerts. The catch? They don’t know how to get invited. Then on Slate Plus, they’re discussing their favorite baby gear—a conversation inspired by Kevin Roose’s column in the New York Times called I Was Skeptical of Baby Gear. Then I Became a Dad. Slate Plus members get a bonus segment on MADAF each week, and no ads. Sign up now at slate.com/momanddadplus to listen and support our work. Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes.  Podcast produced by Rosemary Belson and Kristie Taiwo-Makanjuola.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.f

On this episode: Elizabeth and Zak are joined by Slate staff writer, Aymann Ismail. Today they lend advice to a parent who is struggling with the death of a close friend. When it comes to overdoses and suicides is it better to go over the topic with your kids or deal with it more delicately? Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes.  Podcast produced by Kristie Taiwo-Makanjuola, Zak Rosen and Kevin Bendis. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this episode: Elizabeth, Zak, and Aymann, advise a grandparent who really wants her granddaughter and her granddaughter's cousin to get along. Our letter writer’s first attempts haven’t gone too well and she’s even resorted to bribing—to no avail. Should she keep pushing and, if so, how? Or is it time to step back?  Then on Slate Plus, they discuss A Toddler Father’s Playbook for Answering Tough Questions by David Ostow. Slate Plus members get a bonus segment on MADAF each week, and no ads. Sign up now at slate.com/momanddadplus to listen and support our work. Other mentions: My Favorite Controlled Substance is Daycare by Sarah Suksiri.  Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes.  Podcast produced by Rosemary Belson, Kristie Taiwo-Makanjuola, and Zak Rosen.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this episode: Jamilah and Elizabeth are joined by Courtney Martin, author of the book Learning in Public. Today they are helping a parent who has been offered a great job opportunity that can take the family to the next level financially. The position would require them to live overseas. The catch? The family can’t go with him. Is there a way to still be present in your child’s life if you are working away from home? Recommendations:  Courtney recommends the Rebel Girls app.  Elizabeth recommends Professor Noggin card game.  Jamilah recommends The Bear.  Listener Recommendations:  Julián Is a Mermaid by Jessica Love From the Stars in the Sky to the Fish in the Sea by Kai Cheng Thom The Longest Shortest Time The Principles of Pleasure Come as You Are by Emily Nagoski Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes.  Slate Plus members get a bonus segment on MADA

On this episode: Jamilah and Elizabeth are joined by Courtney Martin, author of the book Learning in Public. If you want to hear more about Courtney’s book check out this MADAF episode. Today they’re helping a step-mom who has found herself in the middle of a complicated housing change. Her stepson wants to live with his mom full time, which is a change that has deeply hurt his dad. Now our letter writer finds herself exactly where she doesn’t want to be—in the middle.  Then on Slate Plus, they are going to be talking about kids fighting and finding resolutions, inspired by a wonderful piece Courtney wrote for her newsletter. Slate Plus members get a bonus segment on MADAF each week, and no ads. Sign up now at slate.com/momanddadplus to listen and support our work. Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes.  Podcast produced by Rosemary Belson and Kristie Taiwo-

On this episode: Zak and Jamilah are joined by Autumn Brown. Autumn is a mother, organizer, theologian, artist, facilitator, and co-host of the podcast, How to Survive the End of the World. They advise a listener wanting to help her kid better understand gender, stereotypes, and their own identity.  Recommendations:  Jamilah recommends Ace of Hates, a card game created by Dan Kois.   Autumn recommends Already Free: Buddhism Meets Psychotherapy on the Path of Liberation by Bruce Tift Zak recommends Joni Mitchell’s set at Newport Folk Festival Additional Reading:  A Kids Book About Gender by Dale Mueller Julián Is a Mermaid by Jessica Love 21 Children's Books About Gender Identity And Gender Expression That Should Be On Every Kid's Bookshelf by Pablo Valdivia Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes.  Podcast produced by Rosemary Belson and Kristie Taiwo-Makanjuo

On this episode: Zak and Jamilah are joined by Autumn Brown. Autumn is a mother, organizer, theologian, artist, facilitator, and co-host of the podcast, How to Survive the End of the World.  They weigh in on a custody conundrum. Our letter writer is furious that her ex-wife is slacking on bathing their children when they’re in her care. It’s come to a head because they’ve been showing up to summer camp grimy from the previous day’s activities and in the same dirty clothes. Our letter writer wants to know if she should change her custody agreement over the lack of hygiene.  On Slate Plus, they brainstorm ideas for breaking the heat without breaking the bank. Slate Plus members get a bonus segment on MADAF each week, and no ads. Sign up now at slate.com/momanddadplus to listen and support our work. Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes.  Podcast produced by Ro

On this episode: Elizabeth and Zak are joined by Stephanie Ryan, author, education consultant, and creator of Let’s Learn about Science. Stephanie shows them some kid-friendly science experiments that are fun for the entire family. Elizabeth’s husband, Jeff, also joins to answer a listener question addressed to him! The listener is wondering if they should keep their small four-door car or trade up to a minivan.  Zak recommends joining an adult league, club, or class. Stephanie recommends Osmo. Elizabeth recommends Endlessly Ever After by Laurel Snyder.  Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes.  Podcast produced by Rosemary Belson and Kristie Taiwo-Makanjuola. Slate Plus members get a bonus segment on MADAF each week, and no ads. Sign up now at slate.com/momanddadplus to listen and support our work. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoice

On this episode: Elizabeth and Zak are joined by Stephanie Ryan, author, education consultant, and creator of Let’s Learn about Science. They help a mom whose kid is pretty introverted and has some anxiety when in new, busy places. The letter writer doesn’t want her daughter to think there’s anything wrong with being a homebody. But she does need to be able to leave the house sometimes. What can be done to help the daughter feel secure and comfortable? On Slate Plus, they discuss How to Raise Kids Who Are Good at Getting Angry by Catherine Pearson. Slate Plus members get a bonus segment on MADAF each week, and no ads. Sign up now at slate.com/momanddadplus to listen and support our work.  Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes.  Podcast produced by Rosemary Belson and Kristie Taiwo-Makanjuola. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this episode: Jamilah, Zak, and Elizabeth answer a question from a listener who lost his libido after his partner gave birth. He feels guilty and doesn’t know what to do. Should she talk to her about it and, if so, how?  Recommendations:  Zak recommends My Name is Yoon Elizabeth recommends the Webb telescope activities and photos from NASA + Comet K2 Virtual Telescope.  Jamiliah recommends Patriarchy Blues  Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes.  Podcast produced by Kristie Taiwo-Makanjuola and Rosemary Belson. Slate Plus members get a bonus segment on MADAF each week, and no ads. Sign up now at slate.com/momanddadplus to listen and support our work. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this episode: Jamilah, Zak, and Elizabeth share their triumphs and fails, including how Talking Heads came to the rescue—at least temporarily. Then they tackle a question from a listener who is feeling guilt about bringing a second child into their family. They obviously love the child but they feel bad that their eldest child is struggling with the change. On Slate Plus, they discuss 'Nacho parenting’ is how some blended families keep the peace by Genevieve Brown. Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes.  Podcast produced by Kristie Taiwo-Makanjuola and Rosemary Belson. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this episode: Zak talks to filmmaker, author, and actor Sarah Polley about her book Run Towards the Danger. They talk about how losing a parent early influences how she parents now. How to handle guilt and why finding your parenting community is so valuable. They also discuss her boundaryless childhood and why she won’t let her kids be child actors. Finally, Sarah talks about navigating parenting while healing from a years-long injury. Recommendations:  Jamilah recommends Lemon Perfect Lemon Water Elizabeth recommends Pinna Podcasts Zak recommends Sarah Polley’s films, specifically Stories We Tell.  Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes.  Podcast produced by Kristie Taiwo-Makanjuola and Rosemary Belson. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this episode: Jamilah, Zak, and Elizabeth share ‘Triumphs and Fails’ and answer a question from a listener whose husband and three year old compete for her attention and she’s incredibly frustrated.  Then, a number of you sent in additional questions about the ripple effects of abortion bans and how to talk to children about abortion, so we’re continuing the conversation. Jamilah brings your questions to Dr. Alison Block, a family physician, abortion provider, executive producer of the podcast The Nocturnists, and mother of three.  On Plus, Jamilah, Zak, and Elizabeth share their favorite easy summer arts and crafts to keep kids entertained. Slate Plus members get a bonus segment on MADAF each week, and no ads. Sign up now at slate.com/momanddadplus to listen and support our work. Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes.  Podcast produced by Rosemary Belson

On this bonus episode from our friends at Slate's The Waves podcast: On this week’s episode of The Waves, Slate staff writer Heather Schwedel and Slate senior editor Rebecca Onion sit down to talk about New York magazine cover story “Canceled at 17,” which features a boy who was ostracized by his peers after he showed a nude of his girlfriend. The talk about whether the article is a display of “himpathy,” and the fact that the writer had a personal connection to the school that she did not initially disclose. (New York magazine’s statement on that matter is available here.) In Slate Plus, Rebecca and Heather talk about what they regret from high school. Recommendations: Rebecca: Apple+’s series For All Mankind. Heather: Netflix’s series, The Summer I Turned Pretty. Podcast production by Cheyna Roth with editorial oversight by Shannon Palus and Alicia Montgomery. Send your comments and recommendations on what to cover to thewaves@slate.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this episode: Jamilah, Zak, and Elizabeth share some parenting triumphs and fails. Then Elizabeth and Dr. Joseph Currin continue to answer teen questions. (Part one of ‘teen talk’ aired on Monday.) Today the questions are all about sex education and navigating potentially uncomfortable conversations.   On Slate Plus, they take turns telling each other their best dad jokes. Slate Plus members get a bonus segment on MADAF each week, and no ads. Sign up now at slate.com/momanddadplus to listen and support our work. Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes.  Podcast produced by Rosemary Belson and Jasmine Ellis. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this episode: Elizabeth is joined by Slate’s Rebecca Onion to process the Supreme Court’s decision to overrule Roe v. Wade. Then, Elizabeth is joined by Dr. Joseph Currin. He is a licensed psychologist and assistant professor who specializes in identity development and sex education. They tackle questions listeners had specifically geared towards teens. This is part one of the teen questions. Be sure to tune into Thursday’s episode for part two.  Roe Coverage Recommendations: Roe Is Overturned. What Happens Now? by Slate Staff Slow Burn: Roe v. Wade This Is a Blood Issue by Susan Matthews Just Doing The Job They Were Put On The Court To Do by Dahlia Lithwick  What The F*** Do We Do Now? by Cheyna Roth and Christina Cauterucci  My Mother’s Abortion Saved My Life by Jenn Lyons The Evolution of Pro-Choice Messaging by Mary Harris Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future

On this episode: Jamilah, Zak, and Elizabeth tackle a question from a listener who is caught in a carpool conundrum. Splitting the 30 minute drive to school has been a significant help. However, the kid they carpool with is downright rude to our listener’s daughter. What should she do? On Slate Plus, the best way to entertain your kids during road trips. Slate Plus members get a bonus segment on MADAF each week, and no ads. Sign up now at slate.com/momanddadplus to listen and support our work. Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes.  Podcast produced by Kristie Taiwo-Makanjuola, Rosemary Belson, and Jasmine Ellis. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this episode: Zak, Elizabeth, and Jamilah reminisce on some of their parents’ triumphs and fails. Then they tackle a question from a listener who just wants her daughter to stop grabbing her breasts. The daughter is looking for comfort but the constant touching is making the listener uncomfortable. On Slate Plus, Zak and Jamilah talk with Elizabeth’s dad about all things fatherhood and grandfatherhood. Slate Plus members get a bonus segment on MADAF each week, and no ads. Sign up now at slate.com/momanddadplus to listen and support our work. Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes.  Podcast produced by Rosemary Belson and Jasmine Ellis. Production help from Kristie Taiwo-Makanjuola. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices