Healthy Family Connections

In this episode, Neil responds to a mother who struggles parenting her 8 yr. old and is riddled with guilt and anxiety. Neil helps this Mom understand the role that childhood trauma and abuse is playing in her life, and how to shift out of survival mode, to a place of health and recovery. In this dynamic podcast, Neil invites the listener to examine how they were “programmed” in childhood and invites them to “upgrade their program”. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

In this episode, Neil responds to mother who feels no one in her family is getting their emotional needs met. Neil offers the listener a deep understanding of emotional needs, and why many people don’t get theirs met or know how to meet the needs of others. Neil offers some powerful tools for addressing emotional needs even under the most difficult circumstances and he includes some realistic scenarios as well. Neil ends the podcast with a challenge for all of us to focus on and provide validation to others, and then write and let him know what happens. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

In this episode, Neil responds to a question from a mother struggling in control battles with several kids at the same time. Neil cautions this mother about her likely parental burnout and offers her a new path forward. Neil explains the difference between being “other-person oriented” and “self-oriented” and how the former invites resistance and the latter invites healthy child and adolescent development. Neil explains how and why self-orientation is a positive personal quality distinct from selfishness and self-centeredness, which are negative personal qualities. Neil role-plays examples of the differences in approache that might just sound painfully familiar. Neil ends with a challenge to all of us to look inward and ask ourselves where we are other-person oriented and where we are self-oriented and to work to become more self-oriented selves. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

In this episode, a father wants to know if his son who gives up easily is suffering from low self-confidence and what to do about it. Neil responds to this dad by reminding him that the way we frame a problem will decide how we deal with it. Neil offers a way to think about the problem that will let Dad help his son develop a “growth mindset”. Neil ends the podcast by challenging all parents to ask themselves if they are setting a good example for their families to be life long learners. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

In this podcast, Neil responds to a Mom who wants to establish rules and limits with her 16 year old that haven’t previously been in place. The catch is, her daughter is strong willed and Mom anticipates her daughter feeling like she is losing something she already has and fighting and arguing. Neil discusses the issue of innate temperament in kids and how to help them understand and appreciate themselves yet not be limited buy their temperament. Here’s the catch, parents have to grow beyond their comfort zones as well. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

In this podcast, Neil responds to a Dad who is stuck between backing off and letting his son fail, and fighting and arguing to get him to do his work. Neil shows this Dad and all parents how to set the school year up for success by teaching goal setting and planning skills to our kids. Neil emphasizes the importance of teaching our kids the skills they will need to be successful adults. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

In this podcast, Neil explains the powerful impact of the Negative Cycle on relationships. He shares the story of his work with “James and Lisa” to show how effective therapy works by focusing on ending the Negative Cycle. Neil challenges listeners to look at their own participation in negative cycles and alternative ways to engage with their partners. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

Stefania, the mother of a 17yr old reports that her husband is so distraught over their son’s behavior that it is ruining their lives and wants to know if she’s wrong for wanting her own happiness. In this episode Neil explains how parents’ feelings can overwhelm kids and can interfere with their ability to learn and grow from their experiences. In the end he prescribes happiness for Stefania and her husband. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

Marissa of Seattle Washington has tried lots of techniques to get her two boys, ages 8 and 10 to cooperate, but nothing ever seems to work. In this week’s podcast, Neil explains the two types of change and how to use the right one at the right time. Then he shows Marissa how to create lasting change in her family. Hint: We should be using one kind of change every day.

Neil answers a question from a Mom who wonders whether therapy is helping her depressed daughter or not. Mom is walking on eggshells wondering what she’s supposed to do. Neil explains some of the causes of depression and the challenges facing teen girls in particular these days. He then goes on to show how individual therapy too often disempowers parents and how a family approach can be far more successful and enduring. Neil offers the Mom a plan to get the right kind of help and off of the eggshells. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

Young Adults are living at home more commonly than ever before and parents need to know how to support their young adult kids without enabling them or supporting their bad habits. In this episode Neil offers great tips for knowing the difference as he answers a question from a mother in Culver City, California concerned about her son who lives at home and doesn’t seem to be making progress in his career. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

Neil answers a question from Al of Chattanooga Tennessee who is struggling to get his teenagers and preteen to do their chores without a fight. Neil explains why chores are important to child and teen development and reviews some of the common mistakes parents often make. Neil gives Al and all parents a strategy to shift out of the chore struggle and put parents, kids and chores on a healthy path forward. He challenges all parents, grandparents and child and teen caregivers to make chores a positive learning experience for kids. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

In this episode, Neil helps parents use summertime planning with their teen-agers to teach planning skills and help them utilize their time away from school to their best advantage. Neil offers some great ideas, some valuable resources, and some great ways to engage the parent-teen discussion. Sign up to get your free checklist to help you determine whether you and your teen are in a normal power struggle or a more destructive control battle - Enter your email address here >> http://eepurl.com/bjMAiX Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

Neil dives into the discussion of the pros and cons of the Netflix series 13 Reasons Why and then offers parents some helpful advise for addressing it. As usual, Neil presents some interesting points of view and doesn’t mince words. Sign up to get your free checklist to help you determine whether you and your teen are in a normal power struggle or a more destructive control battle - Enter your email address here >> http://eepurl.com/bjMAiX Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

Professional Moms often struggle to get the support they need from their families as well as from their employers. Neil shares some of the insights from Mogul, Mom, and Maid by Liz O’Donnell as she explores the challenges of woman in the home and work worlds. And while the challenges of High Performing Moms are plentiful, Neil offers down to earth advise for avoiding the pitfalls and getting the support Moms need and deserve. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

A former client helps Neil learn that he needs to not take clients’ understanding basic concepts for granted. In this episode, Neil takes the basic concept of “listening” that many of his clients are struggling with, and breaks it down so we can all understand and be understood in a more productive way. Then he challenges listeners to take the one week test. Sign up to get your free checklist to help you determine whether you and your teen are in a normal power struggle or a more destructive control battle - Enter your email address here >> http://eepurl.com/bjMAiX Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

Raising successful kids means teaching our kids to be comfortable with failure. In this episode Neil finds the concept of personal vulnerability emerging in many places and all pointing to the same thing, vulnerability, courage, and success all go together. Neil introduces listeners to a book by parents, Dale and Monica Vernon, How Imperfect Parents Lead Great Families as an example of embracing our vulnerable, imperfect selves as critical to our growth and success as parents. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

At a recent presentation to middle school parents, parents wanted real solutions to dealing with aggressive pushback from their teenagers. In this podcast Neil shows listeners how to deal with four common forms of teen pushback and gives parents the critical skills to avoid Control Battles and Parental Burnout and set their teenagers on a healthy path forward. Sign up for our weekly newsletter and receive a free checklist to help you determine whether you and your teen are having a power struggle or a control battle. Enter your email address here >> http://eepurl.com/bjMAiX Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

In this episode, Tracy of Victoria, Australia, wants to know how to deal with her 16 yr. old son who wants to be treated like a young adult yet isn’t managing his responsibilities. Neil addresses this question by helping listeners understand how parental self-doubt and burnout undermine empowered parenting and the ability to set healthy limits. Neil then inspires listeners to turn 3 critical causes of self-doubt and burnout into empowered parenting. Sign up for our weekly newsletter and receive a free checklist to help you determine whether you and your teen are having a power struggle or a control battle. Enter your email address here >> http://eepurl.com/bjMAiX Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

Healthy Expectations for your Depressed Teenager Should a parent lower expectations if their teen is dealing with mental health Issues? Let’s say you’ve already tried some combination of therapy, wilderness experiences, a residential treatment center, psychiatry, medicine, and your teen is still depressed and doesn’t want to go to school, complaining of head-ache, stomach ache, fatigue etc. Will requiring your kid to go to school cause them to get even worse? Should you excuse their absence from school, or should you let them suffer the consequences of an unexcused absence? What’s the best way to be a good, responsible parent and have the best out-come for your kid? This question goes to the very heart of successfully treating depression in teenagers. Listen in for actionable advice for what you as a parent can do. Sign up to get your free checklist to help you determine whether you and your teen are in a normal power struggle or a more destructive control battle - Enter your email address here >> http://eepu