Healthy Family Connections

In this episode, Neil responds to a mother who feels pulled between continuing to support her teen daughter’s interests and feeling resentful and withdrawing that support and feeling guilty. 

In this episode, Neil responds to a Mom who is struggling to get her husband to stop yelling at her and the kids. Neil shows this Mom how to empower herself and communicate with her husband in a way that models the values and standards she wants to see in their home.

In this episode, Neil discusses an article from the Psychotherapy Networker about the different ways that therapists approach learning their craft. Neil shows how this concept applies to how parents approach parenting and the best way to make sure your preferred approach is successful.

In this episode, Neil responds to a mother wondering if she needs to be concerned about her 16-year-old son’s lack of social interest and motivation. Neil empowers Mom to take an active role in helping her son get assessed and get the support he needs to grow his social skills.  Neil emphasizes the importance of therapists addressing both the unique issues with each young client as well as the contextual issues that support the problem.

In this episode, Neil responds to the father of a gifted 10-year-old boy who doesn’t ever finish things.  He quits when things get challenging. Dad realizes that he’s starting to build a Control Battle with his son and wants to know how to avoid it before it gets any worse.

In this episode, Neil responds to a mom who has struggled to cope with and help her abusive husband.  With four young kids, mom feels like she has two bad choices; stay in the marriage or divorce.

In this episode, Neil responds to a mom who has struggled to understand and get help for her young teen daughter with anxiety.  Mom felt relieved to get a diagnosis of mild ASD, but daughter rejected it and mom wants to know what to do next.

In this episode, Neil responds to a Mom whose 16 year old son is using his size and strength to intimidate his mother.  Neil offers a strategy to get her and her son into therapy and shines a light on the difference between effective and ineffective therapies.

In this episode, Neil responds to a mom who knows her teenager is capable and will want to go to college, but the only way they do their work is when she nags.  Mom wants to know what she can do besides nagging or letting them fail.  Neil looks at how therapists often respond to these kinds of situations, why the approach is counterproductive, and how to get it right.

In this episode, Neil responds to a Mom whose adult son is trying to help his wife who suffers from complex trauma and grief.  Neil shows Mom a way to get her son the help he needs.

In this episode, Neil responds to a mom struggling with what to do about her 18 year-old son, whose girlfriend spends the night.  The problem is that they make noise during sex and it’s bothering others.  Neil helps this Mom realize that her model of parenting will not be effective to deal with this problem or many others. Neil shows how therapy can be helpful to mom and the whole family when approached in the right way.

In this episode, Neil responds to a Mom whose young adult son threatens suicide when she talks with him about getting a job or growing up. He has bipolar disorder, is “in treatment” and isn’t showing any bipolar symptoms . She says it feels like she’s living with a terrorist.  Neil shows Mom how to not allow herself to be held hostage, take her son’s threats seriously, and get things moving forward. 

In this episode, Neil responds to a Mom struggling with her son about what school to enroll in for next year.  Son has special learning needs, but just wants to go to the big local high school and be treated as a “regular kid”.  Mom fears he won’t be successful and doesn’t look forward to trying to get the administration to accommodate his needs. 

In this episode, Neil responds to a Dad whose 16 year-old son is depressed, unmotivated and piling up zeros in his classes. Dad doesn’t want to “come down on him” and add to his depression and wants to know what to do.

In this episode, Neil responds to a Mom whose 17 year old is living with his girlfriend, going downhill, and not communicating with his parents.

In this episode, Neil responds to a Mom whose husband agrees with their teenage son, that there’s no difference between Mom having a martini and their son smoking a joint.  Substance abuse and teens is of course bad news, but that’s the easy part.  Neil gives Mom a plan to change the destructive family dynamic.

In this episode, Neil shares powerful insights from the book Hunt, Gather, Parent by Michaeleen Doucleff.  In this groundbreaking book, Michaeleen, an investigative reporter writes what she learns living in three different hunting and gathering cultures with her hard to manage toddler in tow. Her experiences and insights contradict much of what we believe about good parenting.

In this episode, Neil responds to a Dad whose son has been suspended twice in his first year of high school.  Dad is concerned at multiple levels seeing his son as lacking remorse and seeking recognition in very destructive ways.  Neil identifies the critical issues likely going on with this young man and offers the two major elements a school environment will need to provide for him to succeed. Most importantly though, Neil emphasizes the need for Dad to be a powerful ally and advocate for his son.

In this episode, Neil looks at the Royal Family through a Family Therapist’s eyes. Neil reveals two important characteristics of families that lead to dysfunction or family wellness.  

In this episode, Neil interviews psychologist, ADHD and Executive Function expert, and author of 6 Super Skills For Executive Functioning, Dr. Lara Honos-Webb.  In this powerful interview, Dr. Lara and Neil discuss the importance of adolescence as a time for growing executive function.  In it, they identify the best ways to engage teens in this critical developmental process.  Additionally, they offer numerous specific tools to help kids without lecturing and fighting.