Stinker Madness - The Bad Movie Podcast

Brought to you by "Top Pits" starring Tom Cruises and Valerie Kilmer. In 2002, Stallone gave us an 8 time Razzie nominated movie that he took the time to write. Remember! This is the guy that wrote the screenplay to Rocky for which he won an Oscar....the same guy. Yeah....right. It's sort of a movie about race car driving, it's sort of about race car drivers and then its sort of about absolutely nothing. Streaming Do's and Don'ts Exodus:Gods and Kings (first 12 minutes) - HBO Rapid Fire - HBO The Kid with the Golden Arm - Netflix Cyber C.H.I.C. - YouTube (but some butthole removed it....lame) Good Neighbor, Bad Neighbor Pete's Dragon - Pete's Dragon Artax - The Neverending Story Charlotte - Charlotte's Web

Mark Hamill kidnaps a lady so that he can have his doctor zap her brains but first he must give slip to the husband, one Michael Dudikoff. It's a thriller/action/slasher movie where Hamill shows he's nuts, Dudikoff gives us his "whoa-face", we learn who Tommy Wiseau's mother is and Robert Mitchum is on set for about 2 hours! This movie is pretty ridiculous. It never stops moving with absurdity. From Dudikoff getting strapped to the hood of a car in an elaborate death method to the explosion of a family in a station wagon to endless fog to the bad "Xtreme Sports" music choice. It's bat shit.  The film has absolutely no clue what the heck it is. It's a slasher with no blood. It's an car chase movie with little car chasing. It's a thriller with non-diagetic music that fits a 90's Nerf commercial. What it is though is hot. It's fast-paced, laugh a second, splosions all over the place and never-ending ludicrousness. It's awesome. We all really liked Midnight Ride. It's a great time and should not be m

We start this episode with a letter from Justin to Mark Hamill in the hopes he will become his best friend and replace Sam and Jackie on the podcast. We have yet to hear back. It's a film with Mark Hamill and Michael Dudikoff which are no surprise show ups on Stinker Madness. But Academy Award winner Robert Mitchum is in this too?! How did Robert Mitchum make it on Stinker Madness??? Streaming Do's and Don'ts Templar Nation - Amazon Prime Monster Squad - Netflix Plus 2 bonus movies (Not Streaming) - Available at Walmart for $4 Captain America (1978) Captain America 2: Death Too Soon (1978) Good Neighbor, Bad Neighbor Matt Hunter - Invasion USA and Avenging Force Pvt. Joe Armstrong - American Ninja series Jersey Bellini - Bounty Hunters series

We dig into David A. Prior's bouncy lady bits slasher film from 1987, starring Marcia Karr, Fritz Matthews, and superior badass Ted Prior (who all were in the epic Deadly Prey). It's the tale of murder at the aerobics gym that also has a weight room for the tough guys. It's cheesy, with incredible 80's music, Ted and Fritz punching each other just cause, and so much bouncing and splits.  Some of you may know this film as it's other title of Aerobicide but it's labeled as Killer Workout in IMDB so that's what we are going with here. Hope Amazon knows what the hell they are doing. Either way both titles are great. While this movie is no Deadly Prey, it is still a really good time. Especially if you like bouncing lady parts. I can not understate how much bouncy lady parts there are in this film. It's great because the gym never stops having ladies in leotards doing jumping jacks even though there's murders happening at the same time and cops are pulling bodies out. Still gotta make tha

Presented by Dr. Lecter's Killer Workout. Sorry Tina Turner and Chuck Norris, but Dr. Lecter needs your body more than you do. We are back! After a three week hiatus, we've returned in full force with this weeks fine episode. We prepare for our second David A. Prior film entitled Killer Workout aka Aerobicide from 1987. We pay tribute to the late Mr. Prior who will be sorely missed. Make sure to pre-order your blu-rays of Killer Workout, Deadly Prey AND Deadliest Prey which release on Oct. 13, 2015 (Buy Here). Streaming Do's and Don'ts Star Trek: Insurrection - Amazon Prime Heroes of the East - Netflix Good Neighbor, Bad Neighbor - The Indiana Jones special Dr. Marcus Brody Shortround Salah

When you take 70-bajillion characters with vague powers and zero characterization, toss in a very poorly cast James Remar who manages to act worse than Christopher Lambert, sprinkle with crappy, boring fight scenes with a side of the worst special effects ever, and then finish off with completely removing any bit of "Mortal Kombating" while still calling it Mortal Kombat, you've built a movie worthy of being called one of the worst movies of all time. Mortal Kombat: Annhiliation deserves to be in the IMDB Bottom 100, should have swept the Razzie awards and deserves to be mentioned alongside Birdemic and Manos: The Hands of Fate. It is a truly awful and painful film to view. The acting is terrible, the directing is terrible, the writing is terrible, the choregraphy is terrible, the set design is terrible, the music is terrible, the costumes are terrible, and so on a so forth. Despite all of this, the primary problem with this film is none of these. The problem is that it is painfully boring. While all of thes

We open the episode with Sportcenter's coverage of the Mortal Kombat association vs. the Mortal Kombat Players Association legal battle over injuries in the sport. We get ready to experience the "watchable crap" called Mortal Kombat: Annihilation, the sequel to the massively successful Mortal Kombat (1995). Is there a chance that it could possibly be not a giant turd and as much fun as the first one? Odds are not good with it's 11 Metacritic score. In lieu of Streaming Do's and Don'ts this week, our friend @martinishark has gifted us the entirety of Seven (1979). We are now able to finish our total review from the debacle that was our episode that got cut short thanks to bad Internetting. Good Neighbor, Bad Neighbor Jar Jar Binks The Love Guru Ace Ventura (again)

Ed is the masterfully crafted story of a farmer turned worlds best pitcher ever with the help of a hilarious baseball-playing chimpanzee all while discovering the magic of baseball and the magic of children. Or it could be a film about the demonstration making a movie without knowing how baseball and/or animals work with the magic of baseball and the magic of children. You decide! Ed deserves to be in the IMDB Bottom 100. It truly is an awful movie. We think that watching Ed alone may be the worst idea that anyone could have. But with a pretty solid group of riffers Ed can be a good time. It does all it can to help you make funny jokes while watching it. If riffing a bad movie is like a gun, then Ed buys the expensive bullets and then loads the gun for you. Individual Ratings: Over the top action:Cheesy effects:Horrendous acting:Laugh-out-loud-ability:Ridiculous stunts:Gratuitous nudity:Memorable one-liners: Overall Ratings: Good Movie Quality: Bad Movie Quali

Brought to you by TRASH. The new channel featuring animals playing sports. Order TRASH today! Matt LeBlanc graces our TV in the 1996 mega-stinker Ed. Its about a movie of a man in a monkey suit playing baseball! Plus there's a chimpanzee who plays baseball! (Our apologies to Matt LeBlanc, that joke is just way to easy to make) Streaming Do's and Don'ts Outcast - Netflix Can't Buy Me Love - Netflix Star Wars Episode I - The Phantom Menace - HBO Now Star Wars Episode II - Attack of the Clones - HBO Now Good Neighbor, Bad Neighbor  Apologize to our fans, but Sam totally blew it and didn't come up with any good neighbor, bad neighbor picks. If you see him, please shame him publicly.

Donald G. Jackson, Roddy Piper, Sandahl Bergman, and Steve Wang all completely nail it in Hell Comes to Frogtown. It can be argued that there is no funner "bad movie" ever made, especially when how much little money was spent. Sam Hell enters Frogtown to gets some fertile women rescued and then make sweet sweet love to them. This movie rocks. We'll start with our dearly departed Roddy. There's no one out there that could have done a better job with the role of Sam Hell. Period. Roddy nails the role. He's snide, sarcastic, witty, action-packed, intense, funny, and charming. Sam Hell can rival just about anyone out there as for likable characters. Sam Hell is just as lovable as Ash (Evil Dead) or Danton (Deadly Prey). The guy is bad ass and too much fun. Our problem with this film is that its considered a bad movie. It's NOT. This is a high quality, well executed piece with absolutely no flaws. The acting is spot on, the effects are top notch, the story properly delivered, the script is incredible and th

This episode we pay tribute to one hell of a human being, one of the best entertainers in history and possibly the sole reason that Vince McMahon has a successful business; one Roddy Rowdy Piper. In 1988, shortly after the success of They Live, Roddy starred in a little film called Hell Comes to Frogtown. It's the story of a man in charge of boning lots of ladies while kicking ass along the way. Well that sounds pretty rad....and it is. On a personal note, Hot Rod was a real big deal to me. I grew up watching and rooting for Rowdy and Macho Man more than any other wrestlers. I remember being astounded about how energetic Roddy was and how everyone else seemed so rehearsed but he was just off the cuff with anything he said. You could see whoever was on camera with Roddy being completely unprepared with dealing with Roddy. I loved it. Roddy, you'll be missed. Say hi to Randy Savage for me. Streaming Do's and Don'ts Moonbase - Netflix The Avenging Eagle - Netflix I Am Soldier - Amazon Prime Conan Th

LL stars in her Razzie winning opus/masterpiece of terrible cinema, twice! It's the story of a mixed up teen and her mixed up teen doppelganger who suffer from "non-religious stigmata" and death by not finishing piano training. It may be the least frightening horror movie ever made! Lindsey Lohan wows us in the film. She may not have been aware she was in movie for about half of the film. She appears to be either on ludes or vodka quite frequently. You can see her tune out of being there when not giving lines and sorta just stares at the wall. Her "stripping" is awful in that she doesn't actually strip. Oh she dances then? No she doesn't do that either. She just sorta makes a poopy face and slithers around the pole. Wow. I've never stripper danced before but I'm pretty sure I could have done a better job. Despite all this we kinda enjoyed this movie. Its VERY riffable. A couple funny friends and a couple Lohan style glasses of vodka and you can have alot of fun. It's really really bad and really really dumb

Presented by "I Know Who My Agent Is" the horror film that only scares Hollywood. An agent sets out to kill Lindsey Lohan, Paul Giamatti and Will Smith's careers. The horror! Jackie brings in another multi-Razzie winner, with 8 wins, including Worst Actress and Worst Picture. It's the Lohan, starring in her first role as a crack whore but refuses to take her top off. Can it possibly be worse than Wicker Man? Streaming Do's and Don'ts Q - The Winged Serpent - YouTube Curtains - YouTube Mad Foxes - Now removed from YouTube, Sorry. The Invitation - Netflix Good Neighbor, Bad Neighbor Gus Gus - Cinderella Catwoman - Catwoman Teela - He-Man and the Masters of the Universe

It's the second film from Stinker Madness stalwart, Andy Sidaris. No, it's not that one with Brad Pitt and Morgan Freeman. It's the story of seven agency operatives taking down seven criminal overlords on lovely Hawaii for the price of seven million dollars. It's got all the classic staples from Andy and we love it! At least the first hour and 23 minutes, because we haven't seen the end of this film. WHAT?!?! You're going to do a review of a movie you haven't seen all of? Nope we aren't. Sorry to disappoint guys. There's not going to be a review in this one. However, it's quite important to still discuss this film and how we watched it. We were forced to watch this film on YouTube. Because it's not available by any other means. That's right you can't get your hands on this film. It's not for sale. Now here's the real rub. The YouTube copy cuts out at 83 minutes with an ad for a Japanese porno site. Nice. The real fun thing is that this movie keeps getting removed for copyright infringement by the copyright o

Before Malibu Express, Andy Sidaris directed a film called Seven. It's quite hard to find and rarely seen and has been on our list for ages. It stars William Smith and is about seven operators taking on seven villains in Hawaii. Buckle up for the ride! This episode we have no streaming do's and don'ts but we instead discuss the Top Ten Stinker Staples. Be sure to read the whole list. 10. Sobriety superpowers 9. Better take our shirts off 8. Not understanding how phones work 7. The bad guy is bad....because. 6. The lifeless dummy 5. Unlimited ammo 4. Freezeframe, credits 3. Truckin' 2. Leaving by unopened window 1. The Exploding Helicopter Good Neighbor, Bad Neighbor Jordan Tate - Under Siege (Erika Eleniak) Barb Wire - Barb Wire (Pam Anderson) Jill Munroe - Charlie's Angels (Farrah Fawcett)

It should be noted that Sam gets pretty wasted on this episode. We mean very wasted. Like Noah drunk. Be sure to listen at the end for drunk Sam outtakes. Near Dark is highly praised for being the best vampire movie ever made. However that's like saying that the Pinto is the best car that explodes on impact ever made. Its the tale of a farm boy who falls in love with a wandering stranger that's not like any of the other girls. He then goes on a wild ride with a gang of nomads in a van until sunlight wins the day again. Well....we don't like this movie. We found it to be a colossal disappointment with some really misses. In that, the primary problem with this film is that Bill Paxton is incredible. You heard it. Bill Paxton does a fantastic acting job. He nails it. He's infectious. He's memorizing. "Why is that a problem?" you might ask. Because there's far too little of him on screen. His role is super limited and angered us. Hey Bigelow, we want more Paxton! The movie would have been really great would ha

Brought to you by World War V. It's every single badass vampire killer vs every stupid vampire from the last 10 years. Blade leads Buffy, James Crow and the Frog Brothers against the Twilight buttholes, John Depp's Barnabas, Selene from Underworld, and Luke Evan's Vlad. It's time we take a look at one of the highest praised vampire movies of all time. It's Near Dark starring Bill Paxton, Adrian Pasdar and Lance Henriksen. Is Near Dark really that awesome or is it just one of the first films that stray from Bram Stoker's Dracula and Nosferatu? Justin is rolling the dice with this pick as it is so highly praised. Could this be the second "good" film reviewed by this "bad" movie podcast? We also get to some listener feedback and take alot of heat for picking Johnny Mnemonic. Apparently there's quite a few people that think it is a good movie. They are wrong. Streaming Do's and Don'ts Monsters; Dark Continent - Netflix Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey - Netflix Good

Dalton gets brought into make a bar even less fun, get paid way too much, prevent alcohol from being served and then rip everyone's throats out. It's the bad movie classic Road House, 5 time Razzie nominee starring Patrick Swayze and Sam Elliot. This is one of the most viewed and loved bad movies of all time and there's a reason it's so popular. It's ridiculous. It's one hell of a good time. The action is over the top, the dialogue is hilarious, the acting is a atrocious and the plot of completely stupid. It's fantastic. Road House is an epic in "tough guy" business. Every character is super tough (but not as tough as Dalton, of course) and all of the women are damsels that have one motivation in life; get your boobs out. If you get offended by some pretty one dimensional female characters you might want to avoid this one. But if you can get past how offensive this film is, you're in for a great ride. It is one of those rare films that never takes its foot off the gas pedal. It's a really dumb gas

Presented by The Antiques Road House. Dalton stops by to help analyze some precious valuables. This episode we get a preview of the 1988 classic stinker, Road House, starring Patrick Swayze, Sam Elliot and Ben Gazarra. It's a whole hodown at the Double Deuce bar. How many bottles will we smash over each other's heads? Streaming Do's and Don'ts Congo - Netflix Deep in the Darkness - Netflix Donner Pass - Netflix Leprechaun 2 - Netflix Good Neighbor, Bad Neighbor Oda Mae Brown - Ghost Baby Houseman - Dirty Dancing l

It's a cyberpunk trip through the Internet with Keanu Reeves as he portrays Johnny Mnemonic, a hard-drive installed brain courier guy who has to deliver the cure for Chronic Internetitis Addiction to a group of resistance fighters trying to free our minds from evil corporate influence.....or something? The primary problem with this film is that it makes no a lick of sense. Johnny's motivations are contradictory to his actions. The "bad guys" do things to stop Johnny from making his delivers when it seems that they are the only people that would want to hire him in the first place. Everyone seems to be just doing things to do things. Really if everyone just lets Johnny deliver his digital goods, then its in everyone's best interests. Lastly, the whole idea is that Johnny has to deliver 320GB in person with the data stored in his brain. Today, we do that by uploading the data to the cloud and no brain courier is ever needed. It's a terribly inaccurate vision of the future. The good news is that its a total bl