I Only Say This Because I Love You: Talking In Families

  • Author: Deborah Tannen
  • Narrator: Patricia Mulholland
  • Publisher: Simon & Schuster
  • Duration: 12:38:44
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Synopsis

Why does talk in families so often go in circles, leaving us tied up in knots? Linguist Deborah Tannen reveals why talking to family members is so often painful and problematic -- even when we're all adults.

Searching for signs of acceptance and belonging, we find signs of disapproval and rejection. Why do the seeds of family love so often yield a harvest of criticism and judgment? In I Only Say This Because I Love You, Tannen shows how important it is, in family talk, to learn to separate word meanings, or messages, from heart meanings, or metamessages -- unstated but powerful meanings that come from the history of our relationships and the way things are said.

Presenting real conversations from people's lives, Tannen explores what is actually going on in family talk, including how family conversations must balance the longing for connection with the desire for control, as we struggle to be close without giving up our freedom.

This eye-opening audiobook explains why grown women so often feel criticized by their mothers -- and why mothers feel they can't open their mouths around their grown daughters, why growing up male or female, or as an older or younger sibling, results in different experiences of family that persist throughout our lives. BY helping us to understand and redefine family talk, Tannen provides the tools to improve relationships with family members of every age.

Chapters

  • IOnlySayThisBecause 01 Open Preface

    Duration: 29min
  • IOnlySayThisBecause 02 Chapter1a

    Duration: 21min
  • IOnlySayThisBecause 03 Chapter1b

    Duration: 21min
  • IOnlySayThisBecause 04 Chapter1c

    Duration: 17min
  • IOnlySayThisBecause 05 Chapter2a

    Duration: 21min
  • IOnlySayThisBecause 06 Chapter2b

    Duration: 20min
  • IOnlySayThisBecause 07 Chapter2c

    Duration: 21min
  • IOnlySayThisBecause 08 Chapter2d

    Duration: 26min
  • IOnlySayThisBecause 09 Chapter3a

    Duration: 18min
  • IOnlySayThisBecause 10 Chapter3b

    Duration: 17min
  • IOnlySayThisBecause 11 Chapter3c

    Duration: 17min
  • IOnlySayThisBecause 12 Chapter3d

    Duration: 12min
  • IOnlySayThisBecause 13 Chapter4a

    Duration: 17min
  • IOnlySayThisBecause 14 Chapter4b

    Duration: 18min
  • IOnlySayThisBecause 15 Chapter4c

    Duration: 17min
  • IOnlySayThisBecause 16 Chapter4d

    Duration: 14min
  • IOnlySayThisBecause 17 Chapter5a

    Duration: 24min
  • IOnlySayThisBecause 18 Chapter5b

    Duration: 21min
  • IOnlySayThisBecause 19 Chapter5c

    Duration: 20min
  • IOnlySayThisBecause 20 Chapter5d

    Duration: 21min
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