Alonzo Bodden: Who's Paying Attention?

1- CNN No.2- Insult. Lie. Repeat.3- Justice for "lady parts."4- Healthcare reform is sick.5- Just get a better job.6- I don't understand.7- We’re #1.8- Deadly Stupid.9- Goodbye and Good Luck, CP3.

1- 'Dem chickens done come home.2- Outrage? No, just mildly upset.3- Black Lives Matter. We will not go away.4- Beauregard, this here black woman’s got some questions for you.5- Are you 1%? Check your paystub here.6- Ultimate Fathers Day gift.

1- Comey talks. We listen. Nothing changes.2- It's tough to be president the first time.3- Educated brainwashing (you got it, right kids?).4- Green Cards made in China.5- Ethics, now there’s a high bar, laying on the ground.6- Don’t get sick, Ohio. We need your votes.7- Fly 'em if ya got 'em. Damn that government control.8- House what?9- Captain Obvious goes to science class.10- Nascar, here we come.

1- Thank you, Veterans.2- BMW’s in a red state, stupid.3- Obama’s Navy4- Portland heroes: the silence was deafening.5- Lets talk TREASON where’s that hangin rope6- Nance’s Law7- FBI means don’t fuck with them.8- "Trump a complete Disaster," says the other orange guy.9- Body slam to a win.10- Racisms mixed with racists mixed with racists' history.11- Tiger, you need Jesus.12- R.I.P., Frank Deford. Thank you, Sir.

1- Another terror attack.2- Goodbye, Nicky Hayden.3- Pro Life for all Life.4- Just got back from Middle East.5- I promise not to keep promises.6- Black lives still don’t matter.7- The Elephant in the room is called Justice.

1- Showboatin' with big hands will get you fired.2- Hey Russia, guess what I heard.3- Putin says he’ll tell you about secret conversation with no secrets.4- Russia Smussia, are my taxes going down?5- Remember the good ol' days when a potato could bring you down?6- Escape to the NBA.

1- Vive Le France!2- Sally Yates owns Cruz.3- Comey fired. Yeah, it was the emails.4- Hiding in the bushes.5- SNL can’t keep up.6- Sorry, Swami. Condolences to Chris Berman.

1- 100 days of nothing.2- Can we get that Constitution out of the way?3- Pakistan is in me and out of me.4- Boston Racist? Uh YEAH.5- Apple, I just don’t have enough devices.6- My FB advice is don’t take FB advice.

1- I need a "Where’s my Carrier?" app.2- Let's go back to the 50’s.3- Segregation and secretarial pools.4- No Latinos, no Muslims, and just a few commies.5- Reefer Madness.6- You don’t need the internet that you’re using to listen to this.7- Yoga: Exercise for heathens. You find God in church where he belongs.8- I’m going to Pakistan.

1- Don’t bomb Syria. Save it for me.2- Real Presidents drop bombs.3- Coming to a Holocaust Center near you.4- United: You paid for a seat, the police beatings are free.5- Supreme Court Justice thanks the Senate. Now we know who you are.6- Obama forcing Trump to play golf repeatedly at our expense. Trump knows who we are.

1- UNC is #1!2- School is like UBER, so you can’t go.3- My bible says, "Go Nuclear."4- I’ll hunt you in your sleep when it's safe.5- In the long run, would you like to be shot, stabbed, or beaten?6- No, Rachel, you’re not Nigerian either.

1- You sick people are not Making America Great.2- I’ll investigate, if its ok with you, boss.3- Hey, Tomi, turns out they hate women too. Who knew?!4- No leggings except on supermodels.5- Our bad service is better than your bad service.6- Everything great in 7.1 seconds.7- Vegas, baby, Vegas! Get the handcuffs.8- Swipe right for NBA.

1- Can’t shake with little hands.2- Treason? Don’t worry, I got a Supreme Court guy.3- We’re moving on in.4- I got a little Texas in me.5- Artificial Intelligence is sexy.

1- Sorry about Trump... That’s False.2- You’re Fired.3– Captain Obvious. Hey, I’m in jail.4- Get Out, King Kong.5- Billion Dollar bracket.6- Customer is king.

1- Trump behaved...2- Well... for 2 days then Obama tapped something.3- Who didn’t talk to Russia?!4- Ben Carson: Now my day is ruined.5- Repeal healthcare, my day is worse.6- Burlington was nice.7- In my country, Glock equals confidence.8- Did I mention that asshole Ben Carson?

1- Great show I didn’t see.2- Gary from Chicago is da man.3- I wouldn't do dinner and neither will he.4- You don’t agree.5- What level is your racism?6- I agree with W.7- Shaqtin' a fool.

1- Everyone’s protesting, No one is listening.2- You get what you vote for.3- Sweden’s fake attack not covered by real news.4- Don’t listen to my boss.5- NBA protests against Defense.6- Spring training, HOPE.7- John Wick vs Jason Bourne

1- Who you calling illegal?!2- Chicken costs how much?3- 2 Sessions.4- Publik Skools in trouble.5- You weren’t gonna drink that water were you?6- We’re all on TV.7- I am not Atlanta.8- Goodbye, Al Jarreau. Thank You.

1- Jazz meets Country in Mexico.2- Trump news again.3- Pray for me.4- Frederick Douglas saves victims of Bowling Green Massacre.5- Go Falcons!

1- The crowd was as small as your hand.2- The alternative fact is...3- Women marched for women, not against you.4- Supremely bad nominees.5- That SuperBowl thing.