My Mum Has Seen A Movie

This week mum reviews Viola Davis in The Woman King ("Go and see some Black women beat some White ass"). She has also seen 1950s-set Harry Styles vehicle Don’t Worry Darling ("He did well—he came across like a really good arsehole").

This week Julia Roberts and George Clooney have teamed up again in Ticket to Paradise ("Mamma Mia without the singing"). Mum also reviews climbing thriller Fall ("The budget must have been 5 pence").

This week mum has seen Three Thousand Years of Longing starring Tilda Swinton and Idris Elba ("He doesn't do too badly in this"). She also reviews teen horror Bodies Bodies Bodies ("I tried to go to sleep but there was too much screaming").

This week mum has seen Idris Elba in Beast ("It should have just been called 'The Big Cat'"). She also reviews horror sequel Orphan: First Kill ("It all gets a little bit silly, really").

This week mum reviews a couple of duds from Disney: Toy Story spinoff, Lightyear ("We all love Tom Hanks"), and 2021's Encanto ("This is a little bit too long").

This week mum reviews Predator prequel, Prey ("Sorry, Arnie, times have changed"). She also reviews Rogue Agent, a true-crime caper about a creep pretending to be a spy ("It's a good one").

This week mum reviews Nope, Jordan Peele's latest horror flick ("I'm sorry, everybody, but it was shite"). She has also seen sea-shanty sequel Fisherman's Friends: One and All ("Yes to fish!").

This week mum has seen Brad Pitt as a wisecracking hitman "with dodgy hair" in cameo-riddled actioner Bullet Train. She also reviews Joyride, starring Olivia Colman ("It's twee and really frigging annoying").

This week mum has seen swamp-set murder mystery Where the Crawdads Sing ("She gets off with this feller and it all goes tits up"). She also reviews war-artist doc Eric Ravilious: Drawn to War ("He sent a load on a boat that got blown up, but he still had plenty").

This week mum has seen "Ray Gosling" in Netflix's 007 knock-off The Gray Man ("cars blowing up, people getting killed: smashing"). She also reviews twee sequel The Railway Children Return ("it's a bit racist actually").

This week mum has stayed in and watched a couple of Netflix films: You Are Not My Mother, and The Ledge.

This week mum reviews her recent bout of Covid ("Minus 10 out of 10") and Thor: Love and Thunder ("He goes bananas").

There's no episode this week as mum has come down with Covid. Not to worry, she's over the worst of it. Your regular scheduled broadcast will resume as soon as possible.

This mum reviews Baz Luhrmann's Elvis biopic ("His manager was a smooth-talking arsehole"). She had also seen Netflix's Spiderhead starring Miles Teller and Thor.

This week mum reviews Emma Thompson in Good Luck To You, Leo Grande ("If I want to see an old person naked I'll look in the mirror"). She's also seen forgettable Netflix actioner Interceptor ("Maybe it was someone's first time writing a film").

This week mum reviews blockbuster RRR, set in pre-independence India ("We British are absolute arseholes"). She has also seen Alex Garland's latest freakfest, Men ("What the flipping heck is going on here?").

This week mum reviews Jurassic World: Dominion ("They're gone, they're dead, who gives a shit?") and Jackie Chan classic Police Story III: Supercop ("It was absolutely superb").

Mum reviews Marky Mark in Father Stu, a drama about a "down-and-out shit dickhead" who finds God. She has also seen Siegfried Sassoon biopic Benediction ("Brilliant, I loved it").

Little Tommy Cruise is back as flying sex-pest Pete "Maverick" Mitchell in Top Gun: Maverick. Mum also reviews Michelle Yeoh and comeback-kid Ke Huy Quan in Everything Everywhere All at Once.

Mum has seen Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness ("Even if you're friggin' Einstein, there is no way you can follow this film"), and some other flick called Firestarter ("I went in blind, and I wish I'd stayed blind").