Mind Revolution

My guest on today’s show is a special client and friend. You could say she’s my ideal client. Though she has had a challenging path, her tenacity for something better is driving her to change her life from the inside out.    It’s been so beautiful to see.   Maxine Ramirez and I have been working together for a year and a half, and today you get to hear her story and see how far she’s come in that time. Maxine had a rough childhood that included sexual abuse, substance abuse, dropping out of high school, eating disorders… Comparable circumstances have left many feeling helpless and doomed to repeat unhealthy patterns. But Maxine always wanted something better, wanted something more. Her rough beginning has just made her progress that much sweeter.   When Maxine and I first started working together, she shared a secret that she hadn’t voiced previously. She wanted to start her own business. Within three months, she launched her web design and digital marketing agency. Today she is also training to be a master c

Are you in the midst of leveling up? If you’re not sure, make sure you listen to last week’s episode. Today’s episode is the second of a three-part series on leveling-up. Once you know you’re ready to level up (last week’s episode), you’ll be ready for this week’s episode where we discuss what to do in the leveling-up process. Change is part of life. We were meant for change. And sometimes we seek to create change, and other times change happens to us. For many, 2020 has been a year of forced change.  Either way, you have a choice about how you respond. You can be an active or an inactive participant in the change.  The inactive strategy carries attitudes and beliefs of… “I’ll just go with the flow.” “The universe will guide me.” “I’m going to trust that everything will work out.” “I’m just going to let things be.”   If you’re ready to have input in your life and drive change in the direction that you want to go, I have five tips for you.  Make a plan.  Even if you don’t know what you want the end result

Have you ever noticed how you’re wired to want more?  If you’re here, it’s probably because you’re on a self-development journey. You know intuitively that there’s more in store for your life experience if you can tap into your higher power. But how exactly do you listen to that inner voice, your higher power, your soul? Even the idea of “wanting more” makes us uncomfortable. Are we greedy? Can’t we just be satisfied with what we have? When have we reached “enough” success? Wanting more isn’t about trying to fill a void inside. It’s about becoming aligned with your meaning and purpose.  Keep in mind that your bank account, your relationships, your work, your pipeline — these are all just symbols of how you’re doing internally. Ultimately, you want to be “more” of your true self, to get closer to that place where your conscious mind, unconscious mind, and higher conscious mind align. But before you can make any moves in that direction, you’re going to feel some internal nudges inside that something needs to ch

Inside today’s powerful episode, we’re going to work with your future self.  You’re going to learn how to connect with and the ideal, most resourceful, and powerful version of future YOU.  If you're a practical person, NLP will be your jam because it’s straightforward.  The purpose of working with your future self is to create the experiences you want. Say you want to start a business. You have an idea, and you know this business is alive and well somewhere in your consciousness, this business is there, and thriving. In that moment, when you're aware of that thriving business, you’re having a conversation with your future self. And from the perspective of your unconscious mind, this is happening right now. This will help you to create that experience of a thriving business. We create our experiences based on the essence of our focus.  And when we become aware that we’re creating our experience based on the essence of our focus, we can intentionally use that focus because we know the unconscious mind doesn't k

When you hear the word “abundance,” what comes to mind? Maybe the first thing you think of is your bank account. And while that’s one way of measuring abundance, it’s a limited view of the concept of abundance. Abundance means plenty. And is about more than money. Think health, relationships, time, energy, and self-image. Abundance is everything.  Yet money is a great metaphor for whether we’re embracing abundance or pushing it away. If it feels like there’s not enough in your bank account, then my (evidence-based) guess is that you probably feel you don’t have enough in other areas of your life. Abundance is everything — it’s a way of life. You have access to an internal flow of abundance just because you’re here. And here’s the interesting thing — your body will tell you when you’re not living in abundance.  When you sit down to pay the bills and get a knot in your belly, that’s uneasiness. And abundance cannot flow to you in that state. Your state (there’s that word again) — is key. It’s crucial you manage

I recently started a new group coaching program designed to help students achieve big things in a short amount of time — just three months. As you can imagine, it’s pretty intense. We’re setting goals (and making progress) almost daily. Some people in the group have expressed concern about not being able to do it all. There’s work, home, family, kids — obligations galore — plus the coaching program. How can they make the time to do it all? I understand what they’re feeling. Trust me. I’ve been there. I was a single mom, and it was always a balancing act.  Here’s what I’ve learned from my own journey and from my clients’ journeys… The balancing gets easier and answers become clearer when you prioritize self-care. We tend to think that we’re either accomplishing great things or we’re stuck. But it’s really not like that. It’s easy to forget that it’s often the little things we do consistently that have the greatest impact. The big results come from faithful practices — practices like eating well, exercising, wr

As a human being, it’s nearly impossible for you to stop thinking. Here are some quick “thought” facts for you. You’ll understand the weightiness of these a bit later… You have about 70,000 thoughts each day.  90% of those are repetitive thoughts. Half of your thoughts are automatic. (Your unconscious mind is trying to be efficient.) The majority of your thoughts are negative. (We have a negativity bias to keep us safe from saber-toothed tigers and other dangers)   Thoughts are powerful. I often say that you get what you focus on. And since your focus comes from what you think, in essence, your thoughts will determine your outcomes. Especially those repetitive thoughts.  You might be wondering, Where do these thoughts come from, anyway? Good question. Your existing neurology is made up of everything that has happened in your life experience, especially before the age of 5-7 years. Before then, you were like a sponge, soaking up whatever your caregivers told you. Repeated thoughts then became beliefs as the

If you’ve been listening for a while, you know that this isn’t another motivational podcast. We go much deeper than that here.  Let me explain… Have you ever felt compelled to do something, to take action? A client recently contacted me because she wanted to have a quick talk about a business she wanted to start. It would be a business aimed at helping others feel safe and secure — well aligned with what we all need today, right?   Sounds good so far, but we need to get some context. She has been, understandably, upset by all the turmoil she sees in the world. It makes sense that she’s craving safety, security, and certainty for herself and for others, especially since those things were lacking in her own upbringing. We all want these things. She also thinks that her current job is in jeopardy, so she feels the need to create options. What she thought would be a 20-minute chat turned into a two-hour deep conversation of us exploring the birthplace of her ideas. As in, where do all those ideas, inspirations, a

“I know you talk about it all the time, but what is the unconscious mind again?” The unconscious mind is your power center that’s controlling things in the background. You don’t go around reminding yourself to breathe. The unconscious mind handles that for you. It’s also keeping straight which is the brake and gas pedal, how to ride a bike, what your phone number is, your children’s birthdays, all your memories...and so, so much more!  The unconscious mind processes boatloads of information every single second so that the conscious part of the mind can focus on just the (relatively) few things that are filtered in by your focus. Otherwise, we would live in overwhelm and overload. So, in the end, whatever comes into your consciousness originates in the unconscious mind and is then filtered out into your awareness. This is why it’s so important that you manage what goes in. Some important things to remember: The unconscious mind loves repetition. The things you focus on frequently are what the unconscious mind

Everywhere I go, people notice and comment on the fact that I’m an upbeat person. And they’re right. I feel good and positive almost all the time. Really.  Sure, I have moments of setback and overwhelm just like everyone else, but what I’m talking about is the state of my typical, usual days. They’re happy, positive...plain ol’ great days. Wondering how I do it?  First, you should know that it’s not by accident that I have good days the vast majority of the time. I plan to have good days, and I plan to feel great. The days are too precious to leave to chance. So I work at it. And it’s so worth the effort.    I’ve developed some daily practices that keep me on a positive track.   And those practices start the night before. Here are my top five practices for having a great day. The night before, calm the nervous system. Pay attention to how you spend the last few hours before going to bed. If scary, dramatic movies give you fitful sleep, avoid that sort of thing. Figure out what is calming to you and do that i

Impostor syndrome. You know what that is, right? It’s when you’re in your space and having success but you feel like a phoney. Like a fraud who’s about to be outed. Like you can’t really take credit for your achievements. That it was actually just luck all along. Or coincidence. Imposter syndrome can happen to the best of us. I recognized it in myself at a conference recently. “Who am I to be teaching people about self-development?” It was uncomfortable at the time, it but turned into a beautiful experience of releasing negative emotions and shifting focus.  That came after announcing over the microphone to all the attendees what was going on with me. No, I’m not kidding. It was a sweet release as I squarely addressed my own phantom fears. You’ll have to tune in to learn more… So, yeah, impostor syndrome is real. I often see it in my clients too. Impostor syndrome creates issues around the notions of competence, confidence, and criticism. Competence. Where did you get the idea that you need to know it all t

I help others live congruent lives. I support others in aligning their beliefs, emotions, and actions to get in touch with their true selves so they can live the life they were meant to live. Meet Sydney Ward — an energy healer and intuitive guide. She uses yoga, reiki, sacred geometry, and crystal healing, and she also uses components of tarot, moonology, meditation, and Celtic shamanism in her work. While it may all sound woo-woo — don’t worry, even the most skeptical won’t offend Sydney. She understands because she’s a very grounded person herself with a degree in finance and experience in Corporate America.  It’s not difficult to recognize that we’re energetic beings. Our bodies metabolize food so our bodies can use it as energy. We’re also electrical beings with neurological synapses all over the body, sending out electrical signals. Sydney’s work focuses on balancing the energy in the body so that parts of the body with pent up energy share the energy with the parts that lack energy and need a little bo

Starting this podcast was the beginning of my venture into the online space. When I decided to “put myself out there” I didn’t really have a master plan. Over the last year and a half, I’ve created a sizable amount of content — here on the podcast and on the blog. I decided to hire a visibility strategist to give me some guidance.  My goal was to be more visible. I’m creating all these great things, so how can I invite more eyeballs (and ears) to see and hear what I’ve put out there. At my meeting with the strategist, we looked at my follower and engagement numbers compared to those of my “competitors.”  And my numbers didn’t look so great.  “Hey, I’m a winner at zeros,” I joked.  Even though I was joking, looking at those zeros hurt. I felt shame and thoughts of “not good enough” creeping in. “Who am I to be doing this work?” Here’s what was really at the root of this reaction —  I was seeking external validation.  When I’m in my genius zone creating content or working with clients and students, I’m great. I

Have you ever felt like you were meant for something different than your regular day-to-day? Maybe it’s just a hunch that you have right now. Jacq Fisch, my copy and content writer (and now a client) had those kinds of hunches and nudges years before starting her own business as a writer and writing coach.  Jacq joins me on the podcast today — as my first on-the-air guest! — to share her story of congruence. The story centers around her work, but it reaches much farther than that because when you get aligned in one area of your life, it spreads to other areas. Jacq had a great job (as far as jobs go), but after having kids, the corporate-world honeymoon was over in a big way. Work was less fulfilling; she had almost zero family time and even less personal time. After three layoffs in five years and moving the family across borders and states multiple times, she knew something had to change. Still, she found another job after the third layoff because she was a co-breadwinner. Her family depended on her income.

When I set my mind to something, I do it. That’s how this podcast got off the ground. I decided I was going to make it happen, did the work, and here it is.  I haven’t always been that way. I used to be a procrastinator. I’d have great ideas and start on projects, but I couldn’t complete them. Instead of finishing, I’d move to the next idea.   Then I learned about NLP strategies. I realized that I had trouble completing things because I had a fear of closure stemming from a fear of abandonment. (If you know my childhood history, you’ll understand why.) Unconsciously, I wasn’t letting myself finish projects to insulate myself from the threat of abandonment.  Once I understood the root of the problem and became aware of how this fear was impacting my life, I was able to address it and — well, here I am today, creating, launching, and finishing online courses, recording and completing podcast episodes — the list goes on.   Do you have trouble finishing what you start?  Many of my clients do too, and they often f

Remember those 30-minute TV shows back in the day like Leave it to Beaver and The Brady Bunch? They left me with the impression that American family life was wonderful, happy, and harmonious.  And when it wasn’t, no worries. A resolution was sure to come within 30 minutes! When I moved to the US, that image of the happy American family didn’t match my own experience, yet I sought that happiness for years. That was until I let it go and replaced the search for happiness with meaning and purpose.  Ironically, the place where I found the most joy was not in a neat-and-tidy script or happy-life formula.    Here’s what I found: Doing hard things gave my life meaning.   Sometimes I get into conversations with people who want to realize happiness through manifestation. After all, some “enlightened” gurus meditate their way to peace and happiness.  Maybe in time, that can happen for the rest of us, but most of us aren’t there yet. I’m still on a journey, always evolving. And in my personal experience — and my clients

I’m so inspired by the people around me — my clients, my family, my husband, and my students. We’re still seeing some tough things in the world, and witnessing my people carry on doing “normal” things during these tough times is inspiring and a reason to celebrate.  I see parents keeping dinner on the table and keeping the kids busy, pet owners who are attentive to your pet’s needs, businesses who are still serving customers, neighbors who are checking in on one another, you are all amazing and you rock! And if you’re tending to yourself — whether that means giving yourself some grace and a bit of a break or you’re upping the ante in your self-improvement journey — you have my utmost admiration and respect. Just make sure you’re taking your cues from you — not from some inspiring blog post you read or from someone else’s book or program.  Don’t let anyone “should” on you with what they think you’re supposed to do. All the answers you need are within you. You don’t need anyone else to save you.  You — and you

In helping clients and students with changework, I’ve noticed that shame often weasels its way into the change process. It often shows up, disguised as a motivator...which can only be effective in the very short term. Shame is too disempowering to be used as an enduring tool for positive change.  That goes for yourself and for those trying to shame others (maybe you) into change. In the long-run, it’s a losing battle.  Momentum is going to happen whether we like it or not. Momentum tends to spiral into either a positive or a negative direction. And, believe me, shame is not going to propel you in a positive direction in a sustainable way. Why not? Because shame diminishes our self-worth. It causes us to experience a sense of deep powerlessness. It leads to demotivation...the ultimate stuckness. And can eventually lead to a downward spiral. So let’s ditch the shame “motivator” that will only derail our attempts of positive change and replace it with momentum in a positive direction. Think of it as an upwards e

We’re still in the thick of hard times of 2020 with both the pandemic and racial tensions here in the US and all over the world. Many of us are also in the midst of doing some deep change work. And change work is difficult even under normal circumstances. Throw a pandemic, protests, social injustices, and other tensions into the mix, and — well, it can feel like too much. When we received shelter in place orders, some of my one-on-one breakthrough clients wanted to take a break from their active change work. Their desire for change was still there; it just wasn’t the right time. There was too much going on to be able to focus. After taking a breather, most of them have returned — more ready than ever to get back to it.  They realized that it takes constant effort even to hold onto the progress they made. Then there’s momentum to consider. Humans are designed for growth and change. The question is, where is your momentum? Change is going to happen. The question is, will it happen on your terms? There is, no do

I normally steer clear of potentially sensitive topics. It’s important to me that my clients feel safe with and respected by me, so it serves me and that “safe space” well for me to not go there. I have clients from all walks of life, on all spectrums, and I honor and respect them all.  You all know what’s going on in the world post-George Floyd’s death. People have taken to the streets to protest the biases that exist in our world against Black people. One of those protesters is my 23-year-old son.  My son schooled me this week on why it’s important to speak up. How saying “all lives matter” is hurtful. And how right now, it’s important that we highlight the importance of the lives of our Black neighbors, friends, coworkers, and family members.  I raised my boys to not consider the color of a person’s skin. I didn’t want to be distinguished on that basis, and I didn’t want my boys distinguishing or classifying others by skin color. But now I realize that color matters because it’s part of what makes up their